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sooooo

so im writing this out of my stress time at studying. 

like i said before about myself, i dont talk much, i dont like being attached and vica versa. but these days im bothered, really bothered it's stressing me out because i feel so uncomfortable being around this one. 

that one person is actually the opposite of me. opposite attracts? hmmm---not working at this one. 
so let's talk about the first thing. 

1. talk  too much 
the reason why i dont like people talk too much is because it aches my ears hahaha jkjk eue its just because i dont like it, i like to listen, yes im an ear to listen and a shoulder when you need it. but hey no if the topics are bulshit :C it sucks to listen the same thing over and over again, its like you're talking the topic that doesn't even exist. i doubt your existence-- you're talking too much. and please excuse my words, but I don't like it when you talk good about this "thing". everything has its good and bad sides, but the words that come from your mouth about that "thing" is always only the goods and you badmouthing the others. its not that i hate i or dislike it, wait--i dislike it. stop comparing things, you are no good compared to the others either. 
stop talking bad in public, i know you are good, but just stop. you're making yourself bad in front of others and its pathetic. stop talking about people to me just to get my atenttion. stop, you're not getting it. not soon. i wonder what your other friends think about this. i feel bad and sad, why are you turning like this. stop it come back to the old you. we can talk usual topic but i cant stand your topics these days, and since i dont talk much...its stressing when you're expecting me to respond to you when I dont even like you..or your topics..or whatever. 

2. acts like you're everything. 
everything is you and you are everything? the world doesn't revolve around you and you only. stop trying so hard to be good looking in front of people. you always talk about this and that. one thing that i just dislike is you try too hard to be good to the others not to yourself. cant you see how sad you are now? not everyone knows your story, even for those that have already known can be upset. the way you change the way you dressed, the way you talk. the way you see things. it's like everyone should know you, we need to serve you right, back to the simple rule, treat people the way you want to be treated. you always act like you have the biggest problem in the world, heh, go look outside, there are people don't even know what to eat today, so stop being so "helpless". it starts to get on my nerve. 

3. lacks of empathy
hey remeber that night you say something to me when I was happy. maybe you were joking, but it wasn't funny at all. if i can conclude it, it was like "if im happy you should be happy, if im not happy you cant be happy, if you're sad and im happy i dont care" wow you selfish butt--
cant i be happy too? if you're really my friend then why cant you be happy for me? my mood went down that time, maybe you had no idea, but it made me dislike you even more. remember that time one of our friend needs help? but you didn't help. are we even friends? what is friendship to you? we listen to you, all your problems, all your complains. we listen to your happy news and we even support you in everything you do for your own good. no we dont expect you to do the same -eventhough some part of me wanted you to do the same- we just want you to listen. but you never did. you always compared our stories to yours. we don't need that :--C we just want you to listen to me. and if can, you can feel what we feel to, like we always do to you. but we were expecting too much. it's okay. we're used to now. at least we know to not ask you when we need help. 

there are still many things why and why we are getting further and i dont have problem with that, since im that one person okay with sometimes being alone. but if you want to stay close to me with such attitude well then--im trying so hard to adjust but you're mistaking my or the others good attitude toward you.


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